Blog 48: The Ghostwriter

So, I haven't written a blog in a little minute. Part of it is laziness/not wanting to do anything productive after running from job to job all day, most days. Another part of it is that I've been spending most of my free time going out with friends. Weekly fun times, Starbucks get-togethers, sister time, family dinners--it doesn't leave much time for blogging. My last excuse would be that I have just embarked upon a pretty exciting project. As all of you know, I love writing. Editing, however, is also a passion of mine. I love to improve upon another person's work, and I love getting people excited about their own pieces. If I could work in publishing one day, it would be fairly fantastic. Anywho, I had been catching up with an old classmate from college, telling him about my writing/editing aspirations, when everything fell into place just perfectly. It turned out that his dad had just finished a book and was looking for an editor. My name was mentioned, we met to discuss it, and just last week I began editing/ghostwriting the full-length text. Needless to say, it's sort of a big deal for me.

For those of you who don't know what ghostwriting is, it doesn't, in fact, involve dead people with antique typewriters and it has very little to do with an apparition/superhero who saves the world with a giant pencil and then disappears, mysteriously. Ghostwriters are hired all the time by people who want anything from someone to turn their vocal story into a book to people who just need advanced editing on their work. In my case, it's editing, rewording, restructuring, and providing transition between ideas; the man who the book will be credited to is a pastor whose expertise is in writing pointed sermons rather than large bodies of work. So, this project, while hectic (I only have a month to complete the whole thing), could be a great way for me to get more experience that is actually in my field. Who knows? Maybe I'll be editing more books in the near future. It gets my name out there. The author is hoping to have it published by May and is planning a book tour. Good stuff, right?

I know you're just so thrilled about all of this, but I figure every once in awhile I should actually mention what the heck is going on in my life. I think it provides credibility.

In other news, I've been seeing so many people lately making life so much more dramatic than it needs to be. Why is it that everyone feels the need to be angry at their peers for ridiculous things? Someone made fun of you. Who cares? That person was very likely joking, and if not, perhaps you've done something to elicit such behavior. You can't force the desired reaction out of people, but you can actually pay attention to the way that you treat them and prevent their dislike, almost always. Admittedly, I haven't always observed this principle. When I was younger, I didn't quite have a handle on things. If you've ever seen 500 Days of Summer, I definitely had that sort of thing going on. Up front, I'd tell a guy that I wanted nothing to do with a relationship with him. I'd continue to say it, but we would hang out far too much and my flirtatious nature would flare up to its worst levels. Of course, I'd always be shocked and appalled when suddenly the guy would start acting like a dick, but in retrospect--I sort of incited that reaction from him. It happened a few times. I was more concerned with having fun than protecting their emotions, however melodramatic they were sometimes. Worse than that, I went through a period of inconsistency. I'd set these rules and standards aloud and then go against them all. I lost some friends that way and do regret my stupidity, but what can ya do? I think everyone has to go through a process of figuring out just who he/she is.

I've seen a similar situation amongst friends, recently, and find it extremely annoying. Of course, as I went to criticize the girl for not seeing what she had done to bring about the rift, I had to take a look at my own past. Mmm. Humble pie. haha. I used to take sides so quickly and violently, but these days I find myself sympathizing with both sides of an argument more often that not. I think the easiest way to cleanse your life of anger is to see things from the other person's point of view. So Jenny called you fat. That bitch! But think, does Jenny look particularly plump today? Well, there you go. Insecurity, perhaps jealousy are the things to blame for her nastiness. haha. You should never excuse bad attitudes, but you should always try and find the reason behind them. It will make it so much easier to be compassionate rather than wrathful.

Some people, however, refuse to let you make amends for the things that offended them and garnered their disrespect. I had a really close guy friend from Panera who knew me just before my idiot era. He was so offended by the absolutely hypocritical things I did after I stopped working there that sadly, I believe the very sight of me upsets this fellow these days. I was young, stupid, and reckless. And I can actually understand why he wouldn't want to remain friends. It is truly regrettable. I wish the grudge would end, but like I said earlier--you can't demand the preferred reaction. You should never do anything if you aren't prepared to pay the consequences. And you should never expect people to do things exactly the way you would. I forgive quickly and easily. I've had people wrong me that some friends and family still carry resentment for on my behalf, while I just feel better about letting it go. I like to remember the good things about people I've known.

The main thing to remember if someone "turns on you" is that you should examine your own actions. You're probably both in the wrong, so just calm the hell down and quit feeling like everyone is out to get you, despite your "innocence." I think too often we just act based on our own needs/emotions, treating other people as collateral damage without even giving it a thought. Let me tell you, life is a lot more enjoyable when you're not playing the victim all the time or filling yourself with the venom of retaliation. Just learn to treat people right, and usually they will respond in kind.