The truth is, I really wanted to call this blog "The Decline of Heroines in Modern Literature," but I really didn't think anyone would read it. haha. In retrospect, I probably went too far in the other direction. Oh well. Admittedly, I've read some pretty stupid books in the last few years. Stupid, but entertaining. In all this thoughtless and cheap reading, I'm noticing a pattern that I find completely disturbing. More and more often, it seems that the "heroines" in books these days are all the same, especially if there's a romantic storyline involved. They're pale brunettes who are shy, awkward, and have serious self esteem issues. They're quiet, afraid, and fragile. They build their worlds around their love interests to the point that they completely fall apart and become useless when the romance is on the rocks. They feel unworthy. But somehow, all this despair and insecurity pierces the heart of the Adonis and they get their fairytale.
When I was younger, I completely bought into all that shit. I really thought that if I walked around being broody and pathetic, someone would want to come and save me. But you know, no one digs being around a downer all the time. It's annoying. Also, I didn't have the constitution for that sort of meekness. haha. Seriously, though. What IS that? Of course, there's nothing wrong with being a pale brunette. I tend to be fairly pale and have even dyed my hair brown. The problem is encouraging a generation of girls to be spineless and emo. It's as if they believe that the only way to demonstrate gentility and kindness is to be pitiful. This mindset is a poisonous one.
I fully believe that douchebags keep on being douchebags because of girls who are "too nice" to set them straight. Well, it's gross. If some disgusting man is perving out on you, why would you just "laugh it off?" You don't have to take disrespect. You don't have to be a bitch to stand up for yourself, either. Too many people think that being nice means being a doormat. It doesn't make you cute to let people walk all over you and it doesn't make you a good person to let some creep say whatever he wants. Not to go all girl power here, but women need to learn to save themselves from time to time. Keep dreaming some prince charming will come knock that creep out. Maybe he will. But until then, you've got to learn to take care of yourself.
I said all that to say that literature is really in the crapper these days. haha. Where are the Elizabeth Bennetts and the Scarlett O'Haras? Sure, they had their flaws. But they were strong and lively and different from their meek or vapid counterparts. Maybe that's the problem. There are a lot of bitchy, macho women out there these days. Maybe the authors are just overcompensating in presenting an opposite option. Who knows. Either way, it makes me sad.
I really did set out to make this entry funny...unfortunately, today some nasty weirdo called someone I love with an indecent proposal at her job. She just hung up. It isn't her fault that she was shocked. But had it been me, I would've had some choice words for that asshole. I know. I've been letting my sailor tongue slip a lot in this piece. Can I just say that this whole pansy woman phenomenon is something I find completely infuriating? I really have turned over a new leaf in trying to show kindness to people I come in contact with. People around me have noted a difference. I've tried to be more giving, compassionate, and considerate. I finally feel like I'm getting somewhere in these efforts. However, that does NOT mean that I should sit back and allow injustices to fly all the time. And neither should you. I think one of my missions in life is to get people around me to have the balls to be honest and stern. Backbones, people. Backbones!
Thursday, July 19, 2012
Friday, July 6, 2012
Blog 55: The Airport Test
I'm just going to dive right into this one. I think an all-encompassing challenge in adult life is finding a healthy balance of give and take. If you err too much on one side, you'll suffer. I've see-sawed between both ends of the spectrum. My family could tell you I can be quite selfish. Lately, I find myself more on the giving side. And you know, it becomes exhausting. It becomes discouraging. There will always be people in our lives who need that giving part of us. They're takers and they may always be. They still need to be shown through sacrifice what love really means, however. The problem is, just as you have to find an equilibrium in your selfish and selfless habits, you have to balance out the number of givers and takers in your life. If you surround yourself only with people who need you and not friends who replenish you, there will be nothing left to give at some point.
You also have to learn that some people will change when you treat them right. They'll "see the light," as it were. I find myself awed by how so few people know what it's like to be really loved and cared for. We're living in a world full of self-centered bastards, to put it bluntly. So many people I know are amazed at the smallest gestures of kindness. I mean, trust me, I'm no Mother Teresa. But I like to do things for people when I can--especially the people I hold dear. I can't tell you how many of my friends have been "in love" with someone who wouldn't even do them the simplest favors if begged. Why does this happen? Some people have been hurt, surely. But if you harden yourself to the point that another human being's needs don't even matter to you, you've become just as bad as the person who hurt you. You're just making excuses and lending to a sick cycle. You're weak. It's easy to fight and cuss and put people in their place. It's much harder to give of yourself even when you're getting nothing back. That quality is what makes you strong. Okay, rambling.
Anywho, how can you tell which people are worth working with and which are only going to vampirically suck you dry of all love and generosity? Well, this one is tried and true, but also hard to do unless you're a jetsetter. I've only flown twice in my life. I've known three different people who found out that their significant others were not "the one" this way. It's the airport test. If your boyfriend/girlfriend/regular friend will not take you to or pick you up from the airport; or if they leave you high and dry when they're supposed to be doing so, they're not worth your time. Each one of those people who was minorly betrayed in an airport found the relationships crumbling within three months.
In regular life, I say give people time. If, after a few months of you striving to be the best friend you can be, they remain the same, they're takers. And you shouldn't just shun anyone, but you should realize that they're not the sort of people who deserve all of your time and energy and you should create some distance. Love changes people for the better. If someone doesn't change for the better, they may not be the right subject.
I'm in the process of finding out if some people in my life will prove to be takers. I hope not. I'd do anything for them. In the end, maybe I'll have to schedule a flight to find out for sure. haha.I mean, what the hell. I could use a vacation.
You also have to learn that some people will change when you treat them right. They'll "see the light," as it were. I find myself awed by how so few people know what it's like to be really loved and cared for. We're living in a world full of self-centered bastards, to put it bluntly. So many people I know are amazed at the smallest gestures of kindness. I mean, trust me, I'm no Mother Teresa. But I like to do things for people when I can--especially the people I hold dear. I can't tell you how many of my friends have been "in love" with someone who wouldn't even do them the simplest favors if begged. Why does this happen? Some people have been hurt, surely. But if you harden yourself to the point that another human being's needs don't even matter to you, you've become just as bad as the person who hurt you. You're just making excuses and lending to a sick cycle. You're weak. It's easy to fight and cuss and put people in their place. It's much harder to give of yourself even when you're getting nothing back. That quality is what makes you strong. Okay, rambling.
Anywho, how can you tell which people are worth working with and which are only going to vampirically suck you dry of all love and generosity? Well, this one is tried and true, but also hard to do unless you're a jetsetter. I've only flown twice in my life. I've known three different people who found out that their significant others were not "the one" this way. It's the airport test. If your boyfriend/girlfriend/regular friend will not take you to or pick you up from the airport; or if they leave you high and dry when they're supposed to be doing so, they're not worth your time. Each one of those people who was minorly betrayed in an airport found the relationships crumbling within three months.
In regular life, I say give people time. If, after a few months of you striving to be the best friend you can be, they remain the same, they're takers. And you shouldn't just shun anyone, but you should realize that they're not the sort of people who deserve all of your time and energy and you should create some distance. Love changes people for the better. If someone doesn't change for the better, they may not be the right subject.
I'm in the process of finding out if some people in my life will prove to be takers. I hope not. I'd do anything for them. In the end, maybe I'll have to schedule a flight to find out for sure. haha.I mean, what the hell. I could use a vacation.
Sunday, July 1, 2012
Blog 54: 8 Seemingly Innocuous Things That Are Arguably Quite Evil
There are so many injustices in this world. There are so many terrible things happening day by day. Some go by unnoticed. And what travesties, what brutalities are we missing day by day? Schmucks are walking around just committing atrocities. Here are a few that really burn my bacon, to use one of my favorite idiomatic phrases...
8: Cooking bacon in the microwave. Ironically, this terrible act does not, in fact, burn your bacon. It doesn't even cook it very well. Microwave cooking is overrated, you know? People have begun to take way too many shortcuts in life. It's all about speed and quantity rather than quality. Personally, I'm a fan of taking my time and making things delicious. Or beautiful. Or just generally perfect. But for the love of all that is holy, where do we draw the line?? You're telling me it's "just as good" as cooking it in a grease-filled pan? No way. I like my grease extra greasy, thank you. And my fat extra fatty, for that matter. So get your perverted excuse for breakfast food out of my face!
Whew, got a little upset there.
7: Smart phones. Now, here's my thing about them. Everyone I know who has one becomes addicted to the most pointless and ridiculously mind-numbing games. I don't care if you can throw a pig at a bird or whatever the hell that stupid game is about. Your face has been in your phone for several hours. You've completely lost all sense of productivity. And no, I do not find it exciting that you leveled up in Words with Friends. Can you level up? Probably not. I don't understand technology. Except for the fact that it's kind of evil and is slowly eating up all of your time and brain space. You'll be a drooling non-person soon if you aren't already. And all that extra money spent on a data plan? Ridiculous. Bunch of chumps.
6: Kettle brand chips. Not kettle-cooked chips, although that's what they are. It's the specific brand. They're a healthier choice as far as potato chips go. The problem is, they've got a very sinister plot behind them. They're addictive and delicious, like most chips are. But you get them every time thinking "I won't eat the whole bag this time. And look how healthy I'm being." But you're not! You're not being healthy, because you will eat the whole bag, and then you'll just be a fat, sad loser covered in flavored dust. Scrumptious, cheddar-flavored dust. Or sweet onion-flavored. Or buffalo-flavored...Yeah, I've been down that road. Don't go there, friend. I was in a dark place. Dark. And delectable.
5: Vampires. Hear me out. You may say silly things like "vampires aren't real" or "even if they were, people would know they were evil." I would reply that you are fatally incorrect. On both notions. I'm convinced vampires are real. I'm pretty sure Whitteny is a vampire, in fact. (For those of you just tuning in, she is my best friend and former roommate). Also, I don't think people would have a healthy trepidation. They'd probably just all die. Why? Because Stephanie Meyer turned vampires into sparkly, pansy-ass, lovesick artists. And everyone would want to fall in love with a vampire. Why not? They will never die and leave you, they're strong, and they've been around long enough to make their fortunes and get super smart. What's not to like? I'm telling you, don't be fooled. They're evil suckas. Literally. You won't get pregnant (unless Stephanie Meyer was right all around), but you WILL die.
4: The game/app called "Plague, Inc." For those of you who don't know, the object of this game is to eradicate all human life on earth by infecting everyone with a sickness. You can make it bacterial, viral, or even biological warfare in the higher levels. You use earned DNA points to purchase ways to make the sickness more transmittable, deadly, and resistant to the cure. All the while, all the countries in the world are trying to find a cure and you're popping bubbles that halt their research. It's pretty sadistic. The smartest way to play is to keep the sickness absent of symptoms until everyone is infected and virtually unafraid of consequences (and therefore not searching hard for the cure), then use your points to set off the deadliest blood disorders and make it more resistant. Twisted to the max. And I'm convinced that some evil genius somewhere is recording all of your ideas. Once a certain arbitrary amount of people beat the game, he will set his plan into motion to kill us all. So, congratulations. You're an accomplice in ushering in the apocalypse.
3: Dubstep. Yeah, I just added this one because it is only good for making shitty remixes of perfectly good music and ruining awesome songs. It also has been known to make eardrums bleed. If you like it, I hate you. Well. Not really. But I do question your judgment.
2: Good looks. As someone who is just obviously super hot, I can tell you it's a blessing and a curse. Just kidding. Really good-looking people really can be at a disadvantage in life. Their attractiveness is...dare I say...slightly evil. Of course, you can turn it around with a little bit of determination and elbow-grease, but if you don't work at it, you're ruined. Why, you ask? Well. If you're hot, you better have a good lie-detecting ability. A lot of people will be nicer to you than they would be to say, someone of average attractiveness. Someone like me. But they're probably not nice. They probably just want some booty. Listen to your ugly friends. They know. Next, it can keep people from really developing substance. If you can get by on your looks, why work on becoming more knowledgeable/intelligent? Why worry about being funny or interesting or kind? Not all people take on this apathy about self-improvement. But trust me, I've seen it happen. If that's you...you're gross. But you're probably a very good flirt who gets a lot of free shit. Yay for you.
1: Science. You atheist bastards. hahaha, just kidding. That was purely for reaction's sake. Isn't that how all Christians are supposed to think? That brings me to the real point: Prejudice. This one is more serious, yes. Prejudice about people with different ideas is dangerous and stupid. I know what I believe. I know what's true. But that doesn't mean I can't learn anything from people with other beliefs. For example, not everyone who cooks bacon in the microwave is a bad person. They were probably just misguided and confused at an early age, probably due to their upbringing. Or they just don't have tastebuds. Bless their hearts. Don't hate them because they're unfortunate. Everyone has something to offer, even if it's just ideas on what NOT to do. Prejudice prevents you from discovery. So does pride. Pride and prejudice. If Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth Bennett could overcome it, so can you.
8: Cooking bacon in the microwave. Ironically, this terrible act does not, in fact, burn your bacon. It doesn't even cook it very well. Microwave cooking is overrated, you know? People have begun to take way too many shortcuts in life. It's all about speed and quantity rather than quality. Personally, I'm a fan of taking my time and making things delicious. Or beautiful. Or just generally perfect. But for the love of all that is holy, where do we draw the line?? You're telling me it's "just as good" as cooking it in a grease-filled pan? No way. I like my grease extra greasy, thank you. And my fat extra fatty, for that matter. So get your perverted excuse for breakfast food out of my face!
Whew, got a little upset there.
7: Smart phones. Now, here's my thing about them. Everyone I know who has one becomes addicted to the most pointless and ridiculously mind-numbing games. I don't care if you can throw a pig at a bird or whatever the hell that stupid game is about. Your face has been in your phone for several hours. You've completely lost all sense of productivity. And no, I do not find it exciting that you leveled up in Words with Friends. Can you level up? Probably not. I don't understand technology. Except for the fact that it's kind of evil and is slowly eating up all of your time and brain space. You'll be a drooling non-person soon if you aren't already. And all that extra money spent on a data plan? Ridiculous. Bunch of chumps.
6: Kettle brand chips. Not kettle-cooked chips, although that's what they are. It's the specific brand. They're a healthier choice as far as potato chips go. The problem is, they've got a very sinister plot behind them. They're addictive and delicious, like most chips are. But you get them every time thinking "I won't eat the whole bag this time. And look how healthy I'm being." But you're not! You're not being healthy, because you will eat the whole bag, and then you'll just be a fat, sad loser covered in flavored dust. Scrumptious, cheddar-flavored dust. Or sweet onion-flavored. Or buffalo-flavored...Yeah, I've been down that road. Don't go there, friend. I was in a dark place. Dark. And delectable.
5: Vampires. Hear me out. You may say silly things like "vampires aren't real" or "even if they were, people would know they were evil." I would reply that you are fatally incorrect. On both notions. I'm convinced vampires are real. I'm pretty sure Whitteny is a vampire, in fact. (For those of you just tuning in, she is my best friend and former roommate). Also, I don't think people would have a healthy trepidation. They'd probably just all die. Why? Because Stephanie Meyer turned vampires into sparkly, pansy-ass, lovesick artists. And everyone would want to fall in love with a vampire. Why not? They will never die and leave you, they're strong, and they've been around long enough to make their fortunes and get super smart. What's not to like? I'm telling you, don't be fooled. They're evil suckas. Literally. You won't get pregnant (unless Stephanie Meyer was right all around), but you WILL die.
4: The game/app called "Plague, Inc." For those of you who don't know, the object of this game is to eradicate all human life on earth by infecting everyone with a sickness. You can make it bacterial, viral, or even biological warfare in the higher levels. You use earned DNA points to purchase ways to make the sickness more transmittable, deadly, and resistant to the cure. All the while, all the countries in the world are trying to find a cure and you're popping bubbles that halt their research. It's pretty sadistic. The smartest way to play is to keep the sickness absent of symptoms until everyone is infected and virtually unafraid of consequences (and therefore not searching hard for the cure), then use your points to set off the deadliest blood disorders and make it more resistant. Twisted to the max. And I'm convinced that some evil genius somewhere is recording all of your ideas. Once a certain arbitrary amount of people beat the game, he will set his plan into motion to kill us all. So, congratulations. You're an accomplice in ushering in the apocalypse.
3: Dubstep. Yeah, I just added this one because it is only good for making shitty remixes of perfectly good music and ruining awesome songs. It also has been known to make eardrums bleed. If you like it, I hate you. Well. Not really. But I do question your judgment.
2: Good looks. As someone who is just obviously super hot, I can tell you it's a blessing and a curse. Just kidding. Really good-looking people really can be at a disadvantage in life. Their attractiveness is...dare I say...slightly evil. Of course, you can turn it around with a little bit of determination and elbow-grease, but if you don't work at it, you're ruined. Why, you ask? Well. If you're hot, you better have a good lie-detecting ability. A lot of people will be nicer to you than they would be to say, someone of average attractiveness. Someone like me. But they're probably not nice. They probably just want some booty. Listen to your ugly friends. They know. Next, it can keep people from really developing substance. If you can get by on your looks, why work on becoming more knowledgeable/intelligent? Why worry about being funny or interesting or kind? Not all people take on this apathy about self-improvement. But trust me, I've seen it happen. If that's you...you're gross. But you're probably a very good flirt who gets a lot of free shit. Yay for you.
1: Science. You atheist bastards. hahaha, just kidding. That was purely for reaction's sake. Isn't that how all Christians are supposed to think? That brings me to the real point: Prejudice. This one is more serious, yes. Prejudice about people with different ideas is dangerous and stupid. I know what I believe. I know what's true. But that doesn't mean I can't learn anything from people with other beliefs. For example, not everyone who cooks bacon in the microwave is a bad person. They were probably just misguided and confused at an early age, probably due to their upbringing. Or they just don't have tastebuds. Bless their hearts. Don't hate them because they're unfortunate. Everyone has something to offer, even if it's just ideas on what NOT to do. Prejudice prevents you from discovery. So does pride. Pride and prejudice. If Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth Bennett could overcome it, so can you.
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